Communication and collaboration
ESFPs are fun-loving, people-centric carers and thrill-seekers, wanting so badly to jump in and help people. They are not planners, believing that planning would give delusions of control and also that it might prevent them from being at their best which is to seize the moment, carpe diem, indeed it is more like ‘carpe secundus,’ seize the second! They’ll want to fill every available second with something new, interesting and with people. ESFPs are chatterboxes, expressive and so positive, they just want to make everything better, and fun. Interestingly, an ESFP will be chatty and superb at tuning into how people are feeling and opening them up, but they are less forthcoming about themselves as they get their affirmation through other people and what they can do for them. They are far more emotional and can get easily hurt, especially if they feel underappreciated, but they will dust themselves down, put it behind them and focus on the needs of others and having fun. Their maxim is ‘I just need to help, right now!’
ESFPs are like a breath of fresh air, they bring exuberance, energy and enthusiasm to people, in groups or one-on-one as they really care and they will be talkative and extremely optimistic, seeing and emphasising all the positives in a situation. Unlike, say, the ESFJ who will want a plan, ESFPs are totally spontaneous and will go where they feel they are needed, whenever they are needed, and want to talk it all out, for as long as required. They are charming witty, likeable and excitable and will love to socialise, chat and listen. Everyone will know the ESFP is there, bringing a smile and an anecdote to lighten the load. They are practical carers, not big picture thinkers or long-range planners, long term for an ESFP is the next few minutes they are very of the moment and loving just doing stuff to help.
The ESFP desire to just jump in and do, without thinking anything through, means they can prevaricate and put things off, especially tough decisions. This can all be justified by their view that ‘but this needs my immediate attention,’ but the problem is there will always be people needing their ‘immediate attention,’ as this is how they function and get their own positive affirmation and so it means they can put off difficult, important decisions, until ‘whenever.’ This is compounded by the fact that they are so positive and will never want to focus on, or even admit to, anything negative and this can prevent them facing up to some of their own realities and they can lose themselves in supporting others, rather than focusing on themselves. The ESFP decision-making approach is totally subjective, ‘someone needs help. I will help,’ which is great for their friends and families, but maybe not so good for them.
The ESFP does not like conflict and would work very hard to create and maintain harmony with, and among people. Everyone being happy is so important to them and they can’t bear tensions or arguments so they will support, hug, make people laugh, take them on a whirlwind of anecdotes, anything rather than let friction arise. They love the drama of a crisis where they can help, but really struggle if it’s not all ‘everyone happy’ and this can be a problem as, sometimes, conflict is inevitable and even desirable to get views aired and move things on. But it has to be said, that with their likability and charm, there’s few situations where the ESFP can’t make a difference, lighten the load and raise a smile, smoothing all the tension and fractiousness away, as if by magic, but in reality with hard work!