Communication and collaboration
INTJs are basically scientific, objective individuals and so getting to know them or to get emotionally close would be very difficult as they don’t really see the need for an emotional connection, they would prefer people to make logical sense, so feelings are hard for them to fathom. INTJs are private and very difficult to know as they are so unforthcoming on personal issues, in fact on anything unless it’s a topic that they find interesting. INTJs struggle to read other people as they are emotionally more switched off and so they can project as a little cold and aloof as they don’t tend to engage, especially in the early stages, at anywhere near an emotional level, preferring to keep it in the realms of the intellectual and the more transactional.
INTJs tend to be full off or full on in that, if it’s an interesting topic they will happily debate and have strong views that they project, demonstrating their mastery of the subject. However, if it’s personal stuff, chitchat or routine, they’ll withdraw completely into their own world where they can solve their complex puzzles, content in their own company. They are basically quiet individuals, but will switch to being a real chatterbox, but this will be only on issues that stimulates their interest and, once it’s over, it’s over and the INTJ will switch off. They think so deeply about things, tossing ideas around inside their heads, loving to solve complex problems that they are capable of becoming real experts in their chosen fields, but they will see dialogue as having a purpose, to test out arguments, or clarify points, never for its own sake. INTJs are often misunderstood or misrepresented but for the INTJ it just goes with the territory.
INTJs are perfectionists, and their decisions will be made after long periods of reflection and testing their theories out. They don’t jump in, so everything will have been carefully thought through and modelled. Once they’re clear they’ll happily share their views and they will usually be right, as they do not take decisions lightly. Because INTJs are quiet and slightly closed off, it may appear that they have just come up with a theory, or idea, or innovation, but it will have been honed over a long period of time and this will make them very difficult to argue against, as they will have all the bases covered. INTJs are long-range planners, they see the goal, the vision, and they’ll build steadily and relentlessly towards that point, very little will get in their way. This is why INTJs are sometimes seen as ‘smart Alecs’ as a little superior, they’re not, they just have a superb command of their subjects.
As INTJs are so deep and private, and non-emotional, they tend to be quite impervious to their environments, and so if they’re involved in a discussion or a debate, they’ll put their case forward strongly, and well-evidenced, which may upset those who are less robust and more emotional. Their intention would never be to upset people, though to be fair they probably wouldn’t really notice if they did, as their only intention is to get to the truth. Someone slightly more emotional might feel a little bruised after the ‘conflict,’ but the INTJ would be surprised, thinking “what conflict, I though it was a discussion?” INTJs love intellectual pursuits, and debating would simply be an extension of that process, never anything personal but, as it’s when the INTJ really becomes far more vocal, people will notice the change, and this is why they can be seen as argumentative and relishing conflict.